Age 25- England

Louise had a job as a nursing assistant in a senior halfway house kind of thing.

She had a nice flat (apartment) right by the Atlantic ocean all set up. Town of worthing it was called. We stayed in barkingside first, right outside of london. We stayed with a couple also met on liwe named julie and paul. They were great people. Never charged us a dime and loved us to death. I remember the whole house lanned up on 6 pcs. The whole family played counterstrike on the pc. Was a blast and I fucking hated counterstrike.

We took the train into london for a few days. I saw the london art museum , madam tussads wax museum, big ben, the london eye, the aquarium, Westminster abbey, the war museum, parliament, so much architecture. So much cool shit. London I will have to admit was totally banging. Louise bought me a solid gold cross. She was replacing the crucifix I got from charlotte. I was so sad the day I lost it, I wTore since she gave it to me. Only took it off once for noelle to wear while she was in the hospital. It fell off my neck a few times over the years, spent hours looking for it when it happened. One day, I finally lost it completely. Louise just said maybe it was time to lose it to lay to rest all it represented. Was the smartest thing I think that ever came out of her mouth to be honest. So I was really overwhelmed by the gesture. She was a good woman.

So anyway, I happened to be staying up there during this event called guy fawks night. Later to be famous for the whole V for vendetta thing, but the whole thing was like july 4th for thanksgiving. Turns out fireworks were not just legal, you could buy a rocket the size of a bazooka and it was no problem. When I discovered this I bought enough firepower to make disney world blush. What a great night. That was it, time to go on to worthing and meet her family.

Her mum was awesome, very nice lady. Liked her sister too. It was her father, whiskey drunk. Nasty fucking man. Prejudiced against Americans too to boot. Even louise was trying to get me out of there. I guess she didn’t have a clue he would be like that but it was no matter. He was. It would be the beginning of the erosion of us. As much as I tried to like it there I never felt at home. I never felt warm. I had some people I hung out with in the apartment building, but it just wasn’t the same.

Thankfully I still had Liwe, and I started to get involved in gaming professionally. I began to play with my cousin and my uncle in a game called day of defeat. It was a world war 2 reenactment, and a lot of fun. I was half decent but not very good, so I got involved in my cousins clan and I became sort of the tactician. I went beyond the game studied angles, trajectories and position and trained players to be better. I also got involved with MIRC, hung out in a few great channels. Spent my days watching yu gi oh and home and away. When louise was home we’d do

what we could, we weren’t rich but we were together. I mean this girl even spent her days rolling my cigarettes because we couldn’t afford real ones.

I spent a lot of time noticing problems within me I took with me from the states. I made a lot of time to reflect, think, and conquer a lot of damage inside of myself. Including that book of do’s and don’ts I always followed. Instead I finally made a choice to never stop growing, never stop learning, follow my heart, And most of all heal.